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Dump Set

It seems a few readers were unimpressed by my…colorful use of the English language in my previous post. I can certainly understand this, but must offer the following explanation.

1) It was meant for effect. I have, at times, been known to exaggerate certain details for creative effect, and indeed this piece was “creative” in the sense that, while the events I wrote about did happen, I was not nearly as upset as I make myself appear. The truth of the matter, though, is that if I had written a piece about a mildly peeved bike rider arriving at school, the overall message would be lost.

2) The harsh language was meant to be harsh, to create the contrast required for the ending.

3) My main goal was to get the reader to think: Is it a real smile? Do those second grade kids really make all of the previous issues go away? Or is he just putting on a face for his job? Those of you who know me obviously know the answer, but I thought it was worth the thought.

Anyway, this post, I am afraid to say, will contain equally as explicit language as the previous one, though I don’t think it’s for quite the same reason. Let me introduce to you, the “Dump Set.”

Especially read the description on the back, explaining the rules of the game. It’s quite easy to understand, as long as you can hold your laughter for long enough to get through the entire thing. I could not.

Real winners for me are: “Each person put one pasteboard dump on the ground (floor.)”

“Strongly put down the pasteboard dump you’ve put on the ground. If the wind you’ve made by that action turn someone else’s pasteboard dump over, you can get it.”

What’s so wonderful about this is that it was written by someone with at least an elementary understanding of the English language. The general grammar and word usage is correct! And yet…

This “dump set” was gifted to me by Aine, who recently complained that she was not heavily featured in my blog. I aim to correct this here by giving her full credit to the finding of this dump, and by providing a little biography.

Aine (pronounced awnya, though I am sure she will not find this the correct phonetic spelling of her name…) Condon, born (unknown) hails from Ireland. Galway, Ireland, to be exact. This just so happens to be the same city my ex girlfriend Alex spent a semester when I was in Japan. We have discussed it in depth, but while they attended the same university at the same time, we’ve reached the conclusion they did not meet. At 23 years old, Aine is an English teacher of high school students in Nakatsu, Japan. Her interests include enjoying her life with her boyfriend, Freddy Mercury, eating Hamburg for lunch, and making up horrible, yet entirely entertaining puns based on the Japanese language. An example of this would be her classic joke: “When you get sick in Japan, who helps you get better?” “The Odaijini.” Of course this won’t be funny to you all because I have to explain it, but here it goes. Odaijini in Japanese means: “Please take care of your self” or “get well soon” and is pronounced oh die genie. Genie as in the mythical beings who bestow you three wishes. It’s actually quite clever.

I hope this makes up for the lack of references so far, Aine. 🙂

-Dash

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Categories: Pre-Japan
  1. Harrie
    March 13, 2010 at 12:39 am

    referring to your earlier post about the frustration of biking in the rain..I heartily agree with the language as I have been there myself many times in the Netherlands. I can still vividly remember how I felt when I was biking in the rain and against the wind, my rain hood wouldn’t stay on, rain was dripping from my raincoat onto my pants and puddles would get you from below, and, indeed, at the end of the day the wind HAD shifted…

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